You’re right. Habits are always an uphill battle for us humans. That’s why our parents spent years teaching us good habits when we were little! It’s no wonder that healthy food choices are difficult. Look at all the expensive advertising around us for high fat, high sugar snacks, and for fast food meals. I know this is a pipe dream, but I’ve often wished that soda pop was never invented, and that in a single moment, fast food establishments would just disappear!
North America would automatically become healthier. Anyway, it won’t happen. That’s why we need all the people like Brianne we can get!!
Thanks for encouraging us to be the best we can be! And BTW, I’d love to see more posts on chronic pain. Endless possibilities there!
Thanks for the note, Angela! I agree, if our environment were different, so much could change overnight for our health. I really appreciate the suggestion to have more posts on chronic pain! I will keep that in mind and look for ideas.
One thing to get clear about is whether streaks are encouraging (or not). I find them discouraging because my health means I am going to be too tired occasionally, so I use a marble so I can see the habit change occurring even with an occasional miss. (HT to Gauri Yardi who helped me to this realization and the solution.)
This is a great point, Michelle. I really appreciate you mentioning this. I've definitely had times when keeping a streak was impossible and disheartening, and I'll edit the post to note that keeping streak might not helpful. How does the marble idea work? Do you put one in a cup each time you do X, so you can see it accumulate over time?
I also have big feelings and thoughts about the shame hiding in the implied victim blaming. Yes, we would have less pain if we did X, but its not usually will, its environment including difficulty of access, lack of support, etc.
If you didn’t have to problem solve your time at the gym (for example) might you go more often?
Whew, yes. I see what you mean. Thank you for pointing this out. I realize I was focused on the example in the podcast, of having the energy and time and means and just not feeling like doing 20 minutes of exercises, but truly, that's not the reality for many of us. (Maybe I was wishing that was the scenario!) And at times in years past I've been too exhausted or too sick to keep up a habit — this post would have frustrated me. With the gym now, I didn't go today because there was no time between family events and tasks to prepare for the events. Thanks for bringing me back to reality. I hope some of the tips are still useful, and I've used some of them myself (like making my medicine more visible and easy to take in the morning by moving it to my night stand). But now I want to add caveats and grace for what might not actually be doable. I'll work on updating this post. Thank you for taking time to write to me about this, Michelle. I appreciate you.
Yes, there are many ways to do it, I put glass beads in a pretty jar and watch them grow - like watching my substack posts accumulate even if I can’t post every week like I “should”.
I think the tips ARE useful, its the unintentional cultural messaging we have to watch. I 110% resonate with wanting it to be true… I sometimes say Past Me wanting what she’s always wanted has it in for me! Thank you for taking this in the spirit it was offered… I’ve been wondering if I should delete it because I didn’t want to attack or criticize YOU especially in your very own Substack. I enjoy your insights and photos and our comment chats, thank you. Why do we so often assume self-kindness is ‘slacking’ when we look at ourselves? Not other people, of course.
"Past Me wanting what she's always wanted has it in for me" -- ooof! I know what you mean, and that's a powerful way of putting it. I truly do appreciate you pointing my oversights and unintended assumptions out, and I'm glad you didn't delete your comment. Feedback is the only way we learn and adjust our writing and thinking, and I value candid, kind feedback very much. I've edited the post today to acknowledge the real obstacles and add more caveats. I hope it is improved. And if it's not, I can work on it more. Thanks again. I enjoy our comment chats, too. :)
Hey Brianne,
You’re right. Habits are always an uphill battle for us humans. That’s why our parents spent years teaching us good habits when we were little! It’s no wonder that healthy food choices are difficult. Look at all the expensive advertising around us for high fat, high sugar snacks, and for fast food meals. I know this is a pipe dream, but I’ve often wished that soda pop was never invented, and that in a single moment, fast food establishments would just disappear!
North America would automatically become healthier. Anyway, it won’t happen. That’s why we need all the people like Brianne we can get!!
Thanks for encouraging us to be the best we can be! And BTW, I’d love to see more posts on chronic pain. Endless possibilities there!
Angela
Thanks for the note, Angela! I agree, if our environment were different, so much could change overnight for our health. I really appreciate the suggestion to have more posts on chronic pain! I will keep that in mind and look for ideas.
One thing to get clear about is whether streaks are encouraging (or not). I find them discouraging because my health means I am going to be too tired occasionally, so I use a marble so I can see the habit change occurring even with an occasional miss. (HT to Gauri Yardi who helped me to this realization and the solution.)
This is a great point, Michelle. I really appreciate you mentioning this. I've definitely had times when keeping a streak was impossible and disheartening, and I'll edit the post to note that keeping streak might not helpful. How does the marble idea work? Do you put one in a cup each time you do X, so you can see it accumulate over time?
I also have big feelings and thoughts about the shame hiding in the implied victim blaming. Yes, we would have less pain if we did X, but its not usually will, its environment including difficulty of access, lack of support, etc.
If you didn’t have to problem solve your time at the gym (for example) might you go more often?
Whew, yes. I see what you mean. Thank you for pointing this out. I realize I was focused on the example in the podcast, of having the energy and time and means and just not feeling like doing 20 minutes of exercises, but truly, that's not the reality for many of us. (Maybe I was wishing that was the scenario!) And at times in years past I've been too exhausted or too sick to keep up a habit — this post would have frustrated me. With the gym now, I didn't go today because there was no time between family events and tasks to prepare for the events. Thanks for bringing me back to reality. I hope some of the tips are still useful, and I've used some of them myself (like making my medicine more visible and easy to take in the morning by moving it to my night stand). But now I want to add caveats and grace for what might not actually be doable. I'll work on updating this post. Thank you for taking time to write to me about this, Michelle. I appreciate you.
Yes, there are many ways to do it, I put glass beads in a pretty jar and watch them grow - like watching my substack posts accumulate even if I can’t post every week like I “should”.
That's a super idea. I hope you don't mind — I added it to the post with credit to you.
Credit Gauri Yardi, it was more her idea, recast in a way that works for me.
Great — I added her with a link to her website.
Thank you so much for the shoutout, but the marble idea comes straight from Atomic Habits, so I can't take credit. :)
Hi, Gauri! How delightfully funny that the advice originates in the same terrific book. Thank you for clarifying. I'll update the post.
I think the tips ARE useful, its the unintentional cultural messaging we have to watch. I 110% resonate with wanting it to be true… I sometimes say Past Me wanting what she’s always wanted has it in for me! Thank you for taking this in the spirit it was offered… I’ve been wondering if I should delete it because I didn’t want to attack or criticize YOU especially in your very own Substack. I enjoy your insights and photos and our comment chats, thank you. Why do we so often assume self-kindness is ‘slacking’ when we look at ourselves? Not other people, of course.
"Past Me wanting what she's always wanted has it in for me" -- ooof! I know what you mean, and that's a powerful way of putting it. I truly do appreciate you pointing my oversights and unintended assumptions out, and I'm glad you didn't delete your comment. Feedback is the only way we learn and adjust our writing and thinking, and I value candid, kind feedback very much. I've edited the post today to acknowledge the real obstacles and add more caveats. I hope it is improved. And if it's not, I can work on it more. Thanks again. I enjoy our comment chats, too. :)
I like the new version, it has the message and the nuance. Motivation is a process as much as its a momentary spurt of feeling.