5 gifts to give yourself

Plus a birthday ask from me

A happy succulent crew

Hello friends! I hope you are doing well. This is my birthday week, and I love birthdays. All of them. Yours. Mine. Age 1! Age 17! Age 50! Age 84! I feel like we should celebrate them as adults as we do as children — not necessarily with bouncy houses and gift bags of lollipops and slap bracelets (although that would be totally fine) but in some deliciously blissful way.

It may be a product of having cancer at age 25, or just my particular nature, but each birthday fills me with a groundswell of relief, gratitude, and joy. This July, I turn 43, which is a completely unremarkable year by the standards of our numerical system, but is a number I’ve never been before. It boggles my mind.

Our society worships youth, supposedly, but we don’t have to participate. We can say, nope, nope, all ages are terrific, and I am thrilled you are 62! Congratulations!

Every age is a miracle.

Just think: Hundreds of years ago, most humans died before age 43.

So in recognition of the miracle of birthdays, I’m sharing 5 things I would get you if I could and which you can give yourself.

Because that’s another revelation about getting older (and hopefully wiser): Not everything worth having is a thing, and you don’t have to wait and hope, hope, hope for a grown-up to buy it for you on your birthday.

You can care for yourself anytime.

I encourage you to give yourself a gift this week!

1} A great night’s sleep

This is the holy grail for grown-ups, and I realize it does not come easily for everyone. (Parents of babies have a whole different equation, I realize!)

Researchers, though, have studied things you can do to tilt a great night’s sleep in your favor. Imagine planning ahead for a luscious night’s sleep. What would that look like? Maybe …

• Not having any caffeine after lunchtime.

• Skipping alcohol today.

• Plotting out the evening so all devices are off hours before bedtime. Maybe that means you start reading a book (a book!) at 8 instead of turning on Hulu.

• Turning off the Internet router.

• Taking a warm shower or bath before bedtime.

• Having a cup of chamomile tea.

• Turning off your phone and putting it in another room.

• Turning down the lights around you.

• Cooling down the house, if possible.

• Filling your mind with something that is not worrisome. A funny book. A favorite podcast. Sweet memories.

• Making your bedroom as dark as possible. Using an eye mask if you have one. (Tim Ferriss recommends this one.)

• Crawling into bed at an hour that will give you 8 hours of sleep (or whatever your dream number is.)

Doesn’t that sound amazing?

2} Light in the morning (or a sun lamp)

I really believe that sunlight first thing in the morning will help your whole day. It affects your circadian rhythm, your energy, your mood, and when you get sleepy in the evening.

I’ve shared this quote from Dr. Andrew Huberman before:

“The simple behavior that I do believe everybody should adopt, including many blind people … is to view, ideally, sunlight for two to 10 minutes every morning upon waking. So when you get up in the morning, you really want to get bright light into your eyes because it does two things. First of all, it triggers the timed release of cortisol, a healthy level of cortisol into your system, which acts as a wake-up signal and will promote wakefulness and the ability to focus throughout the day. It also starts a timer for the onset of melatonin, this sleepiness hormone, or the hormone of darkness, as they say. Melatonin is inhibited by light. So by viewing light first thing in the day, you set in motion these two timers — one for wakefulness that starts immediately and one for sleepiness that starts later.”

You can go outside as soon as you wake up (well, after you put on pants) and let the sunlight into your eyes, or you can use a sun lamp. Here’s the HappyLight I use. (Not an affiliate link).

I wrote about the revelation of this morning practice in this post: How I stopped feeling so tired in the morning.

3} A new outdoor spot

There are so many advertisements and ways to learn about a new indoor spot — a new cafe, a new shop, a new restaurant.

But what about a new outdoor spot?

What if you look for a sweet escape you haven’t been to before? You probably have dozens of magical spots within an hour’s drive, and maybe even within a 10-minute drive or walk.

Storm King Art Center, one of my favorite outdoor spots

Search online for nearby spots:

• Waterfalls

• Overlooks

• Trails

• Parks (County or state parks are often incredible! The less well-known the better.)

• Lakes

• Bike paths

• Nature preserves

• Beaches

• Outdoor sculpture parks

• Bridges with walking paths

• Gardens

• Ferry rides

Modify this list for your region. Let us know what you discovered!

4} A stack of library books

When was the last time you visited the library?

Libraries have all sorts of things now. Books, yes, stacks and stacks of books. Glorious books. Cookbooks. Novels. Nonfiction bestsellers.

Libraries have audiobooks and ebooks you can listen to for free. Many have DVDs to check out. Some have access to streaming services.

Some libraries also have art you can check out. And some offer free member passes to local museums and attractions. My library has a membership pass to the fantastic Storm King Art Center that you can check out, just a like a book. The pass gives you free admission to a 500-acre sculpture park that ordinarily costs around $20/person.)

I love a fresh stack of books from the library. Here’s my most recent haul:

5} Pet plants

Plants are lovely companions. If you have a friend who has a green thumb, ask them if they have any plants you might be able to take a clipping from — snipping off a small piece, and then planting it in your house to grow a new one.

We’ve propagated lots of new succulents from our current succulents. I pluck off a plump leaf and lay it on soil in a different pot. Over weeks, it grows teeny little leaves and eventually settles in.

Baby succulents that have grown from single leaves

All of my succulents came as teeny baby plants from Succulent Studio in Southern California. They will mail you 2 plants for $10, plus shipping. You can sign up for 2 plants every month, or gift several months to a friend. (You can get $5 off by using my referral code: OuredXHvPaBI. If a pop-up window comes up, click x — you no longer need to enter your email to get $5 off.)

What’s really cool is that if you have a monthly subscription for yourself, you can decide at any particular month that, actually, you have plenty of plants, and you’d like to gift that month’s 2 plants to someone else. You input their address, and the plants are shipped off in a different direction.

Last thing: A birthday request

I’d like to gift my 2 succulents next month to one of you.

Here’s my request:

In the comments below, help me add to this list of gifts for all of us.

Please share one thing below that you’d love others to know about.

It could be free or not. Something that helps you live healthier, and something you think others might benefit from, too. It could be connected to fitness, art, food, breathing, music, etc. It could be a newsletter you love, a podcast episode, a book, an exercise tip, a tea you adore, a quote, a favorite song that elevates your mood. Anything really! I’m hoping we will have a little mini party below.

I’ll pick one of the comments randomly to send 2 baby succulents in August.

Thanks for being here. I hope you have a wonderful week ahead!

To our journeys,

Brianne